"Moving Towards a New Way of Being": 3?s for Tai Dixon, Workplace Culture Strategist

KHP:
For my latest installment of three questions, I am thrilled to have my friend Tai Dixon, founder of Tai D Coaching & Consulting. Tai specializes in driving crucial conversations on race, class and privilege and cultivating liberatory leadership practices. Watch our short 10-minute convo or read the transcript below.

Tai, the COVID pandemic is still raging, and now we're also navigating the pain and complexity of a national reckoning about racism. Things feel so heavy right now at work and in the world. So as a workplace culture strategist, and a coach right now, this moment in time, what are you thinking about? What's top of mind for you as you engage in your work? 

Tai:

Kelly, thank you so much for having me be a part of this.

The first thing that is top of mind is how do we really stretch ourselves as leaders to be available for accountable to and responsive to the needs of the people in our teams?  And I think that kind of upends the traditional notions of leadership that many of us learned that that are becoming outdated, and rapidly. In this moment, we learned that as a leader and as a manager, very often, you're trying to help your team members rise to a set of expectations that you hold… and that has some place in how we drive people to success. But I think what has a greater place is how do we become the leaders that our team members need based on who they are, how they're showing up, what they are uniquely going through, what unique challenges they're experiencing in working in these very unprecedented times… and how we (for each person that we are responsible for at work) become the leader that helps to clarify their perspective in this moment to clarify what actually is necessary versus what might be a nice to have, and to really help, to provide resources and supports for people to get there.

We’re in a unique world and it's going to require a unique solution for each and every one of our team members. And we've got to be thinking about that individualized approach if we want to be successful in this moment and supporting people. So what I'm thinking most about is how do I help leaders really develop that skill and muscle in a very rapid way because the need is so immediate.

 KHP:

I love that. While I- and I'm sure folks watching this- would have loved for you to share a very easy non-complicated answer, it is just true that it is a complicated time.   I appreciate that you’re thinking about that complexity as you always are.

A few weeks ago, in the wake of George Floyd's murder and the ensuing protest, we saw a flurry of activity. Folks were rushing to make Black Lives Matter statements, and all sorts of organizations got called out on institutional racism and oppressive practices. It seems like at least in the news things have calmed down a little bit. What do you hope is the next phase we’re moving into? What do leaders and organizations need to do now? 

Tai:

What I think organizations are now probably experiencing pretty consistently regardless of size or industry is that now that we've made these statements, what now? How do we actually live into what we've said?  There's several ways. This is showing up first in the immediate response to your statement, right? We see organizations who put the statement out on their social media platforms on their websites. And what they're getting in response is mixed reviews from those who are receiving them- some are in support and some are not.  The first measure that your organization is facing is, how are you responding to those who don't agree with your statement? Where are you really going to back up your staff members and those who you support in making that statement with how you actually treat and handle a disagreement with a core value of your organization?

The second thing I'm seeing is a desire for organizations to want to say that they are anti-racist organizations and that they are prepared to live that out. I think that's an important commitment and I want all organizations to be anti-racist organizations, but I want them also to understand what that means. And I want them to understand that that means that proactively we are going to build into our systems, practices, structures, and relationships, ways of recognizing, acknowledging, and changing and shifting power dynamics, such that we change our behavior toward an anti-racist society.  We are moving towards a very new way of being, which frankly, most organizations have not existed in before.  This has never been the central conversation and never has there been such a push to move your organization in some of these ways, thinking about how we advertise our work, publicly thinking about how we recruit people into our organizations, how we train and support them once they get there, what expectations we hold ourselves to that we will deliver these things consistently across our staff, and that they won't experience these things differently based on how they identify… instead, we will set everyone up in this organization with the right level of support and engagement that they need to be successful in their roles with the right level of feedback and clarity, to understand how they can do a great job, but also acknowledge that race exists. That differences in ability exist. The differences in sexuality and gender and sex exist. And we have to name where people are not experiencing our organization in same way so we can actually make the changes in our organization specifically that apply to us.

I think that there's a real moment right now to acknowledge what might've been under the surface for a very long time, bring it to the surface and then really create policies, practices, and ways of being and leading that address what's already there.

KHP: Yes! I feel all of that for myself as a business owner, and as a person, and I can just imagine that for everyone in a leadership seat, that’s a big tall order especially with the urgency we’re all feeling right now.  My last question for you, Tai, is a more personal one. How are you staying grounded and energized right now in a moment that I know is a heavy one in the world and also a super busy one for you as an equity specialist and culture strategist. How are you taking care of yourself so you can show up for your clients and for your family.

Tai:

I'm playing a lot with my toddler in the backyard, I'm cooking dinner. I'm also reading a lot and I'm giving myself time and space to do that, to help sharpen my skills and sharpen my language on some of the theory that I want to be able to help people internalize. I am talking to people and friends that I have not talked to in some time reconnecting. I am journaling.  I'm also trying to think about ways to be even more creative. That's one thing that's left my life in the years since I got busier and busier work-wise and busier and busier mommy-wise. I want to go back down and retrace the things that make me me, because I want to help other people do that, right? You can't do work with others that you have not done with yourself.  And I think that those things are the things that make you show up more alive. We're completely responsive to others if you've been completely responsive to yourself and your needs as they are coming up. So I'm looking for ways to bring in the creativity of sewing and making jewelry again.

But I also am looking in ways to embed this moment in my life. That’s a real shift for me too.  There have been certainly privileges that I've enjoyed in my life that have allowed me to be able to speak about these things in a removed way. And I'm looking for a proximate relationship to the issues at hand for myself too. How can I speak to those most impacted by the oppression that we're talking so much about? How can I revisit my lived experiences and crystallize them so that I can be a vessel to communicate in the spaces that I go into?  So I’m thinking about all those things and leaning into the issue. It doesn't make me feel heavy. It makes me feel like we're moving into the right direction. It makes me feel like we are having the conversation that we have so long needed to have. And as hard as it is, I want to stay steeped in it. I want to stay wrapped in it, and I want to call people to a higher place. And the one good thing, Kelly, that I will say that I can see that's happened since March is that in response to COVID-19, we've seen people figure out how to be responsive to a problem that seemed unsolvable in brand new ways. I think we can do that with this current crisis that we're in, in terms of communications and experiences around race in this country.  We can call ourselves to the carpet and say, we have a problem that feels large and as felt very unsolvable for a very long time. And we are smart people who can reflect on ourselves and our behavior and look at the past and make a very different future. And we can do certainly what's in our power to make something different happen today… and really exploring and holding ourselves accountable to what that action will be is where I see the future of this going. I'm excited to see the creativity and the commitment that will continue to sustain this work going forward and excited to partner with people to do it.

KHP:
Thank you, Tai. I'm always energized and inspired when I talk to you and with you, and today is no exception. Thank you, my friend.